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What do you REALLY want for christmas.

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Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Hi to all.

We all get those wonderful presents at Xmas, socks, bubble bath and handkerchiefs.

But what does a Unix admin Really want??

I will award points and 10 for the most amusing.

Closing date for entries 21 December.
We are open 27/7 so go for it.

Paula
If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
85 REPLIES
Victor BERRIDGE
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Be at home for once?
Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Good answer Victor !!!!

and a good start to this thread

Paula
If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
Maureen Gunkel
Trusted Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Just one user that, when asked 'What did you do?', will actually tell you what they did and in what sequence!
No matter where you go, there you are.
Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Maureen
I was expecting reasonable answers and not pipe dreams.

;-)

Paula
If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
Alan Riggs
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

A week without pager, cell phone, email or angel from God telling about a production outage.

A guarantee from the power company that they will neithe cut lines with bakhoes nor implement rolling brownouts to handle excess load.

An evening out with my coworkers in which nobody jumps every time the cell phone at the next table rings and not one of us has to leave early to implement a change request.

A schedule that can be set more than 24 hours in advance with some assurance that the plans will not change.

No contact at all from upper management.
jherring
Regular Advisor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

DLKM's Dynamically Loadable kernel modules so the system does not need to be rebooted. Although good it never seems to just reboot.
Madhu Sudhan_1
Respected Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

A HP9000 V Class Server with HP-UX 11i software. :)

...Madhu


Think Positive
paul courry
Honored Contributor
Solution

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

12 disc drives driving
11 happy users
10 stacks of printing
9 EDI's transacting
8 completed help desk calls
7 printers printing
6 ServiceGuards servicing
5 phone lines working
4 tape drives backing
3 systems running
2 competent operators
1 and a quiet beeper
Rhonda Thorne
Frequent Advisor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

I always ask for more nerf darts to load into my nerf gun (users know I will use the nerf gun on them hehehe)

a baby gate to place at the entrance of my cube to keep the cry babys out
Sharing my knowledge of UNIX flavors
Dan Hetzel
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Hi Paula,

My first wish is that French companies start working the anglo-saxon way.

My second wish/dream is that French companies stop having meetings where the only decision is: "we won't decide anything until tomorrow (or next week/month/year)"

That's another pipe dream...


;-)

Dan
Everybody knows at least one thing worth sharing -- mailto:dan.hetzel@wildcroft.com
Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

HI
I have not assigned Paul any points at the moment as it has the potential to get the 10.

Unless you know better.

;-)

Paula
If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
Danny Engelbarts
Frequent Advisor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Hey Santa,

I'd like a system without _any_ users ... none at all!

Greetz, Danny.
Shannon Petry
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

This is really pretty easy considering where we are...

I would like for Christmast all of the knowledge of all of the Guru's here in the ITRC -> HP-UX -> Forums :)

(I am good, but could be much better!)


Regards and Happy Holidays
Shannon
Microsoft. When do you want a virus today?
Dan Hetzel
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Hi,

To be the first one to say it here, before Stefan Farrelly

:-))

"I wish that all users of this forum were assigning points after receiving a magical answer"

Dan
Everybody knows at least one thing worth sharing -- mailto:dan.hetzel@wildcroft.com
Kenneth Platz
Esteemed Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

I think Paul's answer takes the cake. And the 10 points, for that matter.

Personally, I'd be happy with one day where every user asked intelligent questions, had reasonable requests, and actually realised that the requests he/she was making did not exceed the theoretical (much less practical) limits of the system (ie, trying to run a program that requires >2G of data space on a 32-bit OS).

Just another pipe dream, wouldn't you say?
I think, therefore I am... I think!
Cheryl Griffin
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

"If I had but one wish this holiday season, then I would wish for all the the children of the world to get together, join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace....

If I had two wishes this holiday season, then I wish for all the the children of the world to get together, and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace and to be given 30 million, a month, tax-free, in a Swiss bank account...."

Ok. I really didn't make that up... the comedian Steve Martin did, but it seems so appropiate.

If I had three wishes, I'd get 10 points for this and be closer to earning that little Wizard's hat. ;^)

Happy Holidays!!
Cheryl
"Downtime is a Crime."
Cheryl Griffin
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Paula,

Thank you for the 5.

Tell us... What do you want for Christmas??
"Downtime is a Crime."
Dan Hetzel
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

Hi Cheryl,

If I was receiving 30 Megabucks a month, I wouldn't bother paying tax !! You're asking for too much !!

;^)

Dan
Everybody knows at least one thing worth sharing -- mailto:dan.hetzel@wildcroft.com
Dan Hetzel
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

I meant "I wouldn't mind...", was that a lapsus ??

:o/

Dan
Everybody knows at least one thing worth sharing -- mailto:dan.hetzel@wildcroft.com
CHRIS ANORUO
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

I go with Cheryl Griffin, unrestricted demostration of love!
When We Seek To Discover The Best In Others, We Somehow Bring Out The Best In Ourselves.
Alex Glennie
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

For forum members to do 2 things when posting questions :

Check if the question has been asked before.

Describe it clearly , don't cut corners on error messages no matter how long etc etc.

The more detail generally the easier it is to answer.

Festive Greetings

Alex
Darrel Louis
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

A trip to the Bahama's.
Lying on the beach with a good cocktail in one hand and a good book in the other hand.
Get a good massage afterwords.

Relax be Flex.
Stefan Farrelly
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.


A 1st class ticket back to NZ and a year off to play golf and lay in the sun.
Im from Palmerston North, New Zealand, but somehow ended up in London...
Patrick Wallek
Honored Contributor

Re: What do you REALLY want for christmas.

For Christmas I would like a system that:

NEVER crashes
NEVER needs any patches or upgrades
NEVER has any hardware failures
NEVER has any software problems
backups ALWAYS run perfectly
software installs perfectly the FIRST time
NEVER needs to be rebooted
users are ALWAYS 100% satisfied with how EVERYTHING runs
runs at 10% CPU Load all the time


Hmmmmm........If the above came true, that would probably mean I'd be out of a job, maybe I ought to rethink that. Then again, that would also mean no pager, no cell phone, no 2AM calls, a vacation/holiday where I don't have to worry about the pager or cell phone..... Hmmmm.........

I hope EVERYONE here has a safe and HAPPY holidays!!!!!!!!!!

(Nice diversionary thread Paula, I wish I could award points to you for the idea!)