1833750 Members
2538 Online
110063 Solutions
New Discussion

Re: A challenge

 
SOLVED
Go to solution
Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

A challenge

Famous lines for systems administrators.

1. ???Show me the money???
2. ???Back it up again SAM???
3. ???In the comms room no one can hear you scream???
4. ???Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the office???



YOUR TURN

Paula
Princess of Bromley ??? Thanks to Rita
If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
32 REPLIES 32
Bill McNAMARA_1
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

"It works for me" (c)(tm)

"Whaddaya crazy?!"

I prefer MacCoys one in Star Trek:
Pick up the mouse and speak into it in a scottish accent: "computer"

Later,
Bill
It works for me (tm)
Joseph C. Denman
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

1. I have not touched a thing!!
2. Oh, did you need backups done?
3. Restore what?
4. I wonder what this will do?
If I had only read the instructions first??
Patrick Wessel
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

Sounds funny when you translate it from German into English:

extra mile - extra cash
There are days when you lose, and days, when the others win
In theory are practise and theory the same - practice shows the difference
There is no good troubleshooting with bad data
Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

More line from famous films.

"Get on yor computer and drink you coffee" -Said with western drawl.


PJFC
If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

From "The scottish play"

wenn wir Neuladen drei wieder wird, in der Donnerbeleuchtung und im Regen.

when will we three reboot again, in thunder lighting and in rain.


Paula
If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
Robin Wakefield
Honored Contributor
Solution

Re: A challenge

How about:

"You've got sendmail"
"Help me omniback, you're my only hope"

Robin
Joseph C. Denman
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

"Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons."
- Popular Mechanics, 1949
"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943

"I have travelled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processings is a fad that won't last out the year."
- The editor in charge of business books for Prentice-Hall, 1957

"But what...is it good for?"
- Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip

"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of DEC

"Hey, I know this! This is Unix!"
- Jurassic Park

"Indeed, it would not be an exaggeration to describe the history of the computer industry for the past decade as a massive effort to keep up with Apple."
- Byte, December 1994

"So we went to Atari and said, 'Hey, we've got this amazing thing, even built with some of your parts, and what do you think about funding us? Or we'll give it to you. We just want to do it. Pay our salary, we'll come work for you.' And they said, 'No.' So then we went to Hewlett-Packard, and they said, 'Hey, we don't need you. You haven't got through college yet.'"
- Steve Jobs, cofounder of Apple Computer

"I'm not dumb. I just have a command of throughly useless information."
- Calvin, of Calvin and Hobbes

"From space, I saw the fragile blue earth without borders."
- Onizuka

If I had only read the instructions first??
Bill Hassell
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

"Tell me again what it is that you do for a living?"

"It can't be a database problem, I've checked it out."

"What do you mean you need more [RAM CPU DISK peripherals...]?"

"Trust me: DOS and Unix are the same, it's just the slashes that go the other way."

-------------------------

Seen many years ago:

System Administrator rules
--------------------------

#1: If users are made to understand that the system administrator's job is to make the computers run, and not to make users happy, they can, in fact, be made happy most of the time.

#2: If users are allowed to believe that the system administrator's job is to make users happy, they can, in fact, never be made happy.

Futhermore, in their quest for happiness, they will cause enough resources to be diverted to trying to make them happy that the computers will no longer run.

Author: Anonymous Ftp



Bill Hassell, sysadmin
Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

Message to Robin Wakefield


I have not assuigned points as I think that deserves 12 but I want to keep the rabbit at bay.

I will therefore assign your points at end.

Princess Paula of Bromley.

If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
John Palmer
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

LVM means never having to say you're sorry.

Backups? Where we're going we don't need backups!

John
Joseph C. Denman
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

Here's a good link to some quotes.


http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~robins/quotes.html

Joe....
If I had only read the instructions first??
Craig Rants
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

"Trust me, I work for the government"

"Good enough for government work"

"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is. " Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut
Rodney Hills
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

System admins do thing by trial and error...

We make an error, users put us on trial.

-- Rod Hills
There be dragons...
S.K. Chan
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

Someone sent me this last week ..

NUMBER OF COMPLAINTS ABOUT YOUR PROFESSION
Astronaut: A few, from people who think the government should be spending its money in different ways.
Fireman: A few, from people who think you take too long to arrive following a 911 call.
Sysadmin: You'll have to learn what comes after "trillion" to be able to count them all.

Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

More:-

"A database user tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti."

Paula
If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
Paula J Frazer-Campbell
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

More :-
---------------------------------
"Made it Ma - Top of thr forum"
---------------------------------

"you want answers?"

"I Want Perfiormance1"

"You can't handle the performance!"
------------------------------------

"I love the smell of a server room in the morning ....smells like.....Unix."

-------------------------------------

"Mama says unix is as unix does"

-------------------------------------

"I am not an animal! I am a Unix Admin."

----------------------------------------

Paula

If you can spell SysAdmin then you is one - anon
Sridhar Bhaskarla
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

Own:

"live by IT"
"thank you for being my *host*"
"As long as my *jobs* is running I have a job"
"I can *finger*, be *nice*, *strip* the *strings* or even *kill*. It's my fantasy"


Borrowed:

"100 ways to get rid of your mouse"

Official:

``Unix is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.'' -- Dennis Ritchie, Unix co-creator

Favourite:

Unix: You think it won't work, but if you find the right wizard, he can make it work.
Macintosh: You think it will work, but it won't.
PC/Windows: You think it won't work, and it won't.''
-- Philip Greenspun

-Sri


You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try
harry d brown jr
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge


"640K ought to be enough for anybody." Bill Gates, 1981.

"stepping over the dollar to pick up a dime". Every budget cycle, I like to remind people that we need to stop stepping over the dollar to pick up a dime. Basically, quit nickel and diming the issues, and buy what we need for the future, not for the moment. Wow you just saved a multibillion dollar company 2,000 dollars, but you expended my time and the other ten of us in the room, consuming more than you saved!


"That's like comparing Apples to Rocks" ---> Once, many years ago, someone in a meeting said "That's comparing Apples to Oranges". I stopped them and asked them what they meant, they proceeded to explain. I then kindly reminded them that they are both fruits, and that I don't eat much of either!

"Without users, our jobs would be easier".

"NT is a multitasking operating system" -- of which I add -- " it can schedule multiple crashes at a time".

"Dave's not here man..."

One day, when asked why I had two serial terminals on my desk (Before X was widely available) I explained to the president of the company I worked for then, that I could perform twice as many tasks, and I added the jab that I usually did more in an hour than most people did in an entire day.


And my favorite:

HELLO, HELLO, ANYONE IN THERE? (As I'm pounding on the keyboard)


live free or die
harry

Live Free or Die
John Payne_2
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

"As a kid, no one ever says 'I want to be a UNIX systems engineer when I grow up...'"

- Stephen Ciullo
Spoon!!!!
Carlos Fernandez Riera
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge


The best user is the died one.

It is 5.000 Pts ( 30 Euro).

You will learn what is a Unix Admin when you dont have anyone.

(c)
unsupported
Rita C Workman
Honored Contributor

Re: A challenge

How about these for Movie Buffs:

Cape Fear - Tape Fears
Ladyhawk - Code it in Awk
King Kong - File Gone


Famous movie quote:
Strong spainish accent !

" Backups...we don't need no stickin backups...."

This is fun !
Rita

...beam me up Scotty !
A. Clay Stephenson
Acclaimed Contributor

Re: A challenge

Frankly Scarlet, I don't give a damn how it works on your PC.
If it ain't broke, I can fix that.
James R. Ferguson
Acclaimed Contributor

Re: A challenge

Hi Paula:

Wishful thinking heard after removing the wrong file(s):

"I'll be back!"

Regards!

...JRF...
James R. Ferguson
Acclaimed Contributor

Re: A challenge

...and heard while trying vainly to read a file from a tape:

"Out, out damn spot."

Regards!

...JRF...